Solo travel, taking a trip by yourself, can be daunting. Especially if you are a woman; maybe more so if you are a woman of a certain age.

So do you give up on travel because you’re female, over 40 and might have to go by yourself? The answer is no, not hardly. In fact, you go forth and conquer!

Our Travel Histories

I hear a familiar story from a lot of women who have always wanted to travel. When they were young, they didn’t have the money, so they couldn’t go.

Later on, when they were establishing their careers and had the money there were other things to spend it on. They were buying homes, paying for braces for their children, and saving for retirement. Not to mention they never had the time between family commitments and work!

Once the kids were grown and there was time and money, they looked to friends as travel companions. Except now it was vacations schedules that never really synced, or disagreement on where to go.

The only option was going alone, and for most of these women that wasn’t really an option!

What Stops Us?

I understand the hesitation; I understand the anxiety about going solo when you reach mid-life and beyond.

At twenty you’re invincible – immortal even. When you are thirty, you can claim the confidence and self-assurance that life has thrown at you. We hit forty and we start to wonder if it’s too late because we aren’t twenty any more.

And so it goes every decade; heck, every year brings another set of reasons why we shouldn’t take that trip.

We become the prisoners of our own anxieties at some point. There are worries about mobility or illness. Concerns about safety creep in. Then there are all the well-meaning friends and relatives who feed those fears. It’s a vicious circle.

A week ago I talked about some sstrategies for dealing with travel anxiety. It’s worth a read if you are letting your fears hold you back.

The Challenges of Solo Travel

Once you get over the underlying anxiety, there is a new set of challenges to face. Isn’t there always?

Dining solo was perhaps one of the hardest things for me. Sitting in a restaurant, by myself, eating a meal; nothing about that was appealing to me. I had this vision of sitting in a dark corner, staring at a wall and hoping that the waiter even remembered I was there.

A friend of mine was daunted by foreign languages. She was positive that she would be lost and alone, unable to communicate and secretly sure that everyone was laughing at her.

Eating, transportation, language and more can be a bit harder for the first time solo traveler. The good news is that there are strategies to getting through those first bumbling attempts. The better news is that once you have, you feel invincible.

For me, having a notebook to write in makes dining alone not just bearable, but easy. I love sitting down to a meal and recording my thoughts on the day. The simple action of writing keeps me centered and happy.

Heading to the Travel/Tourist Information (TI) booth at your arrival airport will help you with lots of challenges from understanding local transportation to getting tips on places to see. Most TI locations have staff that speak English, and who are really invested in your experience.

The Advantages of Solo Travel

Let’s talk about the up side of solo travel.

My favorite thing about traveling on my own is that I don’t have to constantly re-negotiate my trip. I get to decide what I want to see and do and eat without having to worry about a travel companion’s likes or dislikes.

Most of us can relate to that trip that went sideways because our travel companion is a picky eater, hates art or only wants to shop. I have my own experiences with people who need to have a specific itinerary and are unwilling to change anything.

Another advantage is the number of people I have met. Traveling with a friend gives you a baked in conversation partner, so it is unlikely that you will strike up a conversation with someone on the train or in a restaurant.

I have met some very interesting people this way; folks who I probably wouldn’t have chatted with had I been with friend. Not that I am indiscriminate in who I talk to, but that’s another benefit of solo travel, you develop a pretty good radar very quickly.

In fact, solo travel has made me a better listener, and as a result I have heard some amazing stories. I learned that people want to tell their story, and all I have to do is let them. These stories are some of the best mementos of my solo travel adventures.

Believe in Yourself – You’ve Earned It

Sure, we may not be twenty anymore, but the majority of us have learned a thing or two along the way to where we are! We have a confidence that has been honed over a couple of decades of being female in this world. If anyone knows how to take care of ourselves, it is us; because we have been taking care of ourselves – and others – for quite a while now.

We have earned the right to have a few adventures. After spending so much time and energy spent just getting here, don’t you think you deserve that dream trip? I know I do – I think you’ve earned it.

Bottom line, age doesn’t have to be a barrier any more than gender does. A sense of adventure, curiosity about the world, the desire to learn and grow – these don’t have a sell-by date; so get off the shelf and go, even if it means going solo.